Heckin Game Inbox

[tothosewhobait]

[For messaging and continuations, beware possible 18+]

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[tothosewhobait]

[Pauses the ear rubs and squints]

…Isn’t that just a boyfriend, but with the added perk of occasional assistance with murder?

[infinitecruelty]

...

[Eyes darting around like he can spot a good answer flying around above them somewhere.]

Uh-...

[Blinks and purses his lips.]

[Opens mouth...!]

[Closes mouth.]

Hm.

[Crosses his arms and lifts a hand to tap his cheek.]

Is it?

[tothosewhobait]

[Shifts a bit on his legs, eyebrows furrowing in thought]

In fact…is there even anything you can actually think of that you want? Or are you simply out here making deals because you enjoy arguing? Your talk a big game about having me at your disposal, but do you have any idea what you would even do with me?

[infinitecruelty]

[Sits up on his elbows with a groan and a roll of his eyes.]

What part of "have you at my disposal" are you not getting? It means "Have you around for the foreseeable future-" [...wait, no, clarify that.] "-until I have a good idea. And also after. For when another good idea arises."

[tothosewhobait]

Do you even know what my ability actually is? You keep saying I’m a master scam artist, so you do not actually even have proof I can do anything. You are offering me access to everything you know you have with no real proof of what I have to offer in return. Basically…you fell for it.

[infinitecruelty]

Ah, ah! I haven't agreed to anything yet.

So did I "fall for it" or did I just get you to admit you're a scam artist? [Laaaying back on the blanket again, crossing his upper set of arms behind his head while the other taps along on Azul's knee.]

And on the off-chance that you do have legitimate power, I'd have you contractually obligated to be on my side~ Seems like a win-win to me...

[tothosewhobait]

[Moves forward, bracing an elbow on either side of Envy's head, before leaning in reaaaaally close, bumping his nose against Envy's]

You absolutely fell for it. And you did agree. You made an offer and all I have to do is accept. A verbal agreement is still an agreement, you know. Unless...you realized too late and are trying to do damage control?

[Lowers his lashes as the corners of his mouth turn up slowly, the smug grin obvious even in his voice if Envy cannot see it on his face from this close. The longer lock of hair falls forward to brush against Envy's cheek as Azul tilts his head to talk quietly right against Envy's ear, pushing closer and pressing them chest to chest.]

Either way, it will be me who wins. It's all right though, afterall....I am a master scam artist, right? So, try not to feel too bad.

[infinitecruelty]

[His eyes widen as Azul nears, pupils narrowing into cat-like slits, not entirely sure where the witch intends on stopping. He sucks in a breath through his teeth when their noses meet, his entire body freezing in preparation for... something.

When it doesn't arrive on the mouth, but instead the ear, he's able to take another (albeit shaking) breath, and mentally gnaw on Azul's words. There's no way he's lost. He didn't lose, he can't.]

A- [Hm, wow, his mouth is so dry, suddenly.] A verbal agreement means nothing. It's "He said," "She said," it's- it- it would barely hold up in court.

[Maybe he is trying to do damage control. The other option is to accept the reality that he's made the agreement to be someone's murder!boyfriend in exchange for the possibility of having his wishes granted, and-...

and that just can't be!]

I- I have to sign something. I'm not agreeing to anything without signing something.

[tothosewhobait]

[Sits up and snaps his fingers, a golden scroll appearing in one hand]

That can be arranged.

[infinitecruelty]

[Oh, shit. He figured he'd have to at least get up and go get paper or something.

Goddamnit. Of course the witch can summon scrolls at will and shit. Fuck!]

I- Wh. How.

[Growls and waves his hands.]

No, no. This. That- that wasn't. This isn't how this is supposed to work.

[tothosewhobait]

Perhaps we can find an arrangement that is more…agreeable…to you then? I am that benevolent, afterall.

[infinitecruelty]

[Roooollls his eyes. Look at that, they've come full circle!]

And we're back to the benevolence.

[tothosewhobait]

It was the most admirable trait of the great sea witch.

[infinitecruelty]

Was she also a master scam artist?

[tothosewhobait]

[He is so offended on the behalf of the great sea witch that there are not even WORDS.]

[infinitecruelty]

[Blinks]

...what?

[tothosewhobait]

...I am going to pretend I didn't hear that.

[Stands up carefully, pausing for a moment...he's been kneeling for a while and even if his legs don't hurt here, old habits die hard. Once he's confident his legs won't give out he starts to brush off whatever sand has found its way onto his clothing]

[infinitecruelty]

[Oh hey, personal space is his again. He sighs and rolls over onto his stomach, stretching out all his limbs with another yawn.

He hums, doing his best to seem unbothered by any of this nonsense....]

So, have I lost my chance at benevolence?

[tothosewhobait]

Oh? Are you saying you wish to sign now?

[Folds his arms and levels a stare at the back of Envy's head, not that it can be seen what with Envy on his stomach, but he's got that energy right now]

[infinitecruelty]

[Oh, he can feel that shift in his energy, the edge to his tone...

Envy's tail slithers proudly on the blanket, wrinkling it further.]

Are you going to deliver on your end of the bargain?

[tothosewhobait]

That depends, do you plan to ask for the impossible just to see me scramble to try and make it happen? I may have magic, but I am no miracle worker.




Also. You're doing it again.

[infinitecruelty]

I will ask for things within reason, alright? For instance, I won't ask you to, oh, I don't know. Make me God or bring me back to life or anything fantastical like that~

[He rolls over again and sits up, eyeing the mess he's made...

And doing nothing to fix it. He simply casts an expectant look Azul's way.]

But, that will require that you tell me what you are capable of. ...When the time comes, of course. I mean, we've got all the time in the world to find out what each other can do, don't we~?

[He sure is chill for someone who supposedly lost.]

[tothosewhobait]

[Holds out a pen to him, notably not the one he was toying with earlier....how many pens does this guy carry around?]

Then? What are you waiting for. Just sign right at the bottom.

[infinitecruelty]

[How many does he have, and where the hell is he keeping them?

Oh well, that can't be terribly important. He may as well bite the bullet and sign. He takes the pen and jots his name [Envy the Jealous] on the line in perfectly beautiful, perfectly legible cursive... like he's had a long time to improve that skill or something.]

There.

[He hands the pen back.]

Are you happy, now?

[tothosewhobait]

Delighted, really.

[Once the contract is signed and back in his hands, his posture and expression smooth out completely. Carefully tucks the scroll away, not going to mention the fact Envy didn't even bother to read what he just signed. It's better for them both if Envy feels he got the better end of the deal, afterall.]